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How to Teach Children the Gospel Without Presuming

To teach children the gospel, tell them plainly who God is, what sin is, what Christ has done and what God asks of us, and call them kindly to repent and believe. Then wait on the Lord. A child who prays a prayer, says the right words or grows up in a good home has not for that reason been born again, and a parent should not tell them they are saved on that ground.

This is one of the hardest parts of Christian parenting, because we love our children and we want to know that they are safe. So let us look at what the gospel is, why we do not presume, what to look for as a child grows and what a parent can do.

How to teach children the gospel in plain words

God made us and rules over us. All of us have sinned, “for all have sinned, and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). Sin deserves death, “but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23). Jesus, the Son of God, lived without sin, died on the cross in the place of sinners, and rose again. God calls everyone to turn from sin and trust in Him. Paul described his own preaching as “testifying both to Jews and to Greeks repentance toward God, and faith toward our Lord Jesus” (Acts 20:21). Tell your children this as clearly as you can, as often as you read a passage that shows it.

Why we do not presume a child is saved

Jesus said, “Most certainly, I tell you, unless one is born anew, he can’t see God’s Kingdom” (John 3:3). The new birth is the work of God. It is not produced by a Christian home, by church attendance, by good behaviour or by a prayer. God says through Ezekiel, “I will also give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit within you” (Ezekiel 36:26). He is the one who gives it, and He gives it as He chooses. At the same time, God uses His Word taught at home as the ordinary way He brings children to faith. “So faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God” (Romans 10:17), and Timothy had known the holy Scriptures from infancy (2 Timothy 3:15). So we teach, and we do not despair.

Jesus also warned, “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter into the Kingdom of Heaven” (Matthew 7:21). A child can say the right words because they want to please a parent, and so we are careful.

The danger of treating a prayer as proof

Some children are led through a short prayer and then told that they are now Christians. A parent who does this means well, and the result can be a child who feels safe without ever turning to Christ, or who doubts later because the prayer did not seem to change anything. The Bible's invitation is to repent and believe. Repentance and faith are real turns of the heart. God gives them, and the child truly turns. So if your child prays to trust Christ, rejoice, and keep teaching and praying.

What to look for over time

A new heart shows over time. Proverbs says, “Even a child makes himself known by his doings” (Proverbs 20:11), and Paul lists the fruit of the Spirit as “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, and self-control” (Galatians 5:22 to 23). Look for sorrow over sin that is more than being caught, a growing love for Jesus and His Word, a desire to pray and to be with God's people, and a willingness to say sorry and to forgive. These come slowly and imperfectly, even in an adult. Do not demand them from a young child, and do not announce them as a verdict. Talk with your pastor or an elder when you see them.

What a parent can do

  • Teach the gospel, in family worship and at other times, in words a child can follow.
  • Call your child kindly to repent and believe, and do not press for a quick answer.
  • Pray for your child by name, asking God for a new heart.
  • Live as a repentant believer in front of them, saying sorry and coming to the Lord for forgiveness.
  • Answer their questions honestly, and take them seriously.
  • Bring them to church, where they hear the Word preached and see the people of God.

If your child does come to trust Christ, point them to what God has promised and not to the prayer they said. John writes, “These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, that you may know that you have eternal life” (1 John 5:13). Talk with your elders about what comes next. The session for Mark chapter 10 tells of Jesus welcoming children and speaks of receiving the Kingdom like a child. The session for 1 John chapter 5 speaks of knowing that we have eternal life, and it is a good chapter for an older child or teenager to read with a parent.

Rest in the Lord's mercy

Paul writes, quoting the prophet Joel, “Whoever will call on the name of the Lord will be saved” (Romans 10:13), and he adds that calling on the Lord comes from believing (Romans 10:14). We cannot see into a child's heart, but He can. Keep teaching, and keep pointing your child to Christ, who died for sinners and rose again. He saves all who come to Him, and He hears the prayers of parents.

Begin with a short family worship session tonight, and let the gospel be heard in your home. If this helps you, you can give here so that other parents can find the same help. May the Lord give your children new hearts, and give you patience as you wait.